When we first heard about Jerry Springer the Opera it had to be a joke…until the fixture of trashy daytime tv moved from small theatres in England to a sellout season on Broadway. Just like melding Disney characters with ice, it seems that putting narratives we know and love to music is a sure-fire winner.

The latest all-singing, all dancing, strangely juxtaposed sensation being brought to life in the US is Spiderman, the Musical. Out of all the superhero choices, it makes sense to expand on the original catchy theme tune that seamlessly incorporated lyrics like ‘radioactive blood’.

The really big news for everyone, apart from Tobey MGuire and Kirsten Dunst, is that they are holding open auditions for the starring roles. If you, or someone you know, can combine shooting webs from their wrists with a great rock singing voice, then this is the moment they’ve been waiting for. Casting will take place in New York on July 28 (10a-5p) at The Knitting Factory, 74 Leonard Street. The directors are looking for their Peter Parker (male, 16-20s); Mary Jane (female 16-20s); and a mysterious Principal woman (25-35) where the brief is “think Sinead O’Connor with a Middle Eastern/Bulgarian/Greek twist”. Perhaps a lady with a shaved head, an angelic tone and one hit will be Spidey’s on-stage nemesis.

With music and lyrics by Bono and The Edge, the final product promises to be a multi-cultural mix that should attract more than an incy wincy following. I hope someone is filming this…